I Am the very Model of a Modern Bridge Competitor

Written by: Richard James Hill

I am the very model of a modern bridge competitor,

I write many pages as a club newsletter editor.

I know the Laws of Contract, and I quote debates historical,

From revoking to etiquette, in order categorical.

I’m very well acquainted too, with card play mathematical,

I understand all squeezes, both simple and quadratical.

As committee President, I’m teeming with advocacy,

With many cheerful rulings tinged with my hypocrisy.

In short, as bridge player, President and editor,

I am the very model of a modern bridge competitor.